nuttin honey

not much new lately, school has been kicked back into full gear, so im incredibly busy. I get real sick of the lack of free time that this "school" thing affords me. I finally found a topic for my paper, but now the deadlines are staring me in the face, and my first instinct is to turn and run the other way. That first 10 pages due date will be here sooner than i know. Other than the go to school, read, and then go to more school routine, i dont have much new to report to myself. Funny and strange story= I was at wal-mart last week getting the oil changed in my car, and the guy that was working on my car had a seizure. I guess that isnt really a funny story, its actually rather unfortunate for the guy. However, i have never known anyone that had a seizure before so it was a first for me, which makes it strange. Isnt it sad that that is the most interesting thing that has happened to me in a while. I heard a funny joke a couple of days ago from one of my professors.

"how many psychiatrists does it take to change a lightbulb?"

"one...but the lightbulb really has to want to change."

somewhat amusing.

stupid ending

i was watching "law and order" last night, one of the best shows ever, when i witnessed one of the worst charecter exits ever. Elisabeth Rohm left the show to pursue a "movie" career. Good riddance. Granted, she was increadibly hot, but she could act about as well as Flava Flav. Anyways, in the episode she ended up getting fired, doesnt really matter why, and the closing sequence went as follows

"you're fired"

"is this because im a lesbian?"

"No"

"Good"

And that was it....talk about the strangest and stupidest ending to a charecter of all time! im pissed. click.

no reason to cry

right now I am reading "Love, Poverty, and War" by Christopher Hitchens, and it has been extremely interesting. So today I am sitting in the library reading the book in between classes and a something very strange happens. A girl a couple of tables to the left of me is checking her grades on the internet and she suddenly breaks down in tears. She is weeping and complaining about how she doesn't know what she is going to do next, and how she is soo angry! Next, she starts laughing hysterically and crying at the same time, which is something everyone should witness at least once if you haven't yet. when it happens you are confused, and half expect them to start strangling people or turn their head 360 degrees. It is strange. Anyways, while this is going on I am reading one of Hitchens essays about the Kurds and the horrible decimation and gassing of Halabjah in 1988, an incident in which Saddam massacred hundreds of thousands of Kurds without blinking an eye. at this moment it became evident to me just how lucky we as Americans are to be able to sit around in the comfort of middle America and cry about grades that our daddy is probably paying for. These Kurds would give almost anything to be in our position, and they would be extremely grateful to get any grades instead of bombs, and they wouldn't cry about either. This is also relative to the other devastations occurring right now in the world, such as the the tsunami, the Iraq war, and the crisis in Sudan (which bush doesn't seem to care about). of course, I realize every day how lucky that I really am as an American, I guess it just took the dichotomous relationship between the two situations for me to be reminded once again.

lick my nuts wal-mart

i realize that i have been requesting a lot of nut licking lately, but i really do like to complain. its pretty much my favorite thing to do. Anyways, aside from the numerous things that are fundamentally wrong with wal-mart (the fact that it is slowly sucking the life out of small business America and quickly taking over the corporate world and the world in general, while still claiming to be creating jobs and helping us, even though those jobs are minimum wage jobs for people that lost their previous jobs because wal-mart undercut their business), i have found one more thing to complain about. I cant believe i just admitted to shopping at wal-mart! oh well, im a poor college student, im not sure many people will hold it against me. However, I went to wal-mart tonight to buy some groceries, namely $77 dollars worth of them. At the checkout lane, a very nice teenage worker proceeded to place my 77 dollars worth of groceries in 16 plastic bags. There is no doubt in my mind that all of my groceries could have been placed easily in about 8. This is not the first time this has happened, it is just the first time that i have had somewhere to write down my complaints. if this is a regular occurance, which i will assume that it is because it has happened to me almost every time that i go, then wal-mart has found yet another wonderful way to WASTE! im sure that those plastic bags arent hurting the enviornment at all...nah, its not possible. im not sure that wal-mart will understand that though, so let me put it in their language--you are losing LOTS of money with your liberal usage of bags. the money that you would spend taking the time to teach these people to bag properly is nothing compared to the loss of money you will incur from your current behavior. think about it. im out this, peace.

lick my nuts mediacom

Last night for the National Championship game my cable decided to go out. However, this was a special kind of problem--every channel worked except ABC. That means that people could watch anything they wanted except the national championship game. there is no doubt that mediacom will be getting many calls about this, and they deserve everyone of them. I hate them. I pay 40 bucks a month for basic cable, and all that I ask is that it work, especially for the biggest college football game of the year. Nope, too much to ask. YOU SUCK MEDIACOM.

lick my nuts blockbuster

LIARS

Well, Blockbuster has done it again. After hearing about the new "no late fees" gimic at blockbuster I decided to go rent a movie to see what was up. Of course, the bark was much louder than the bite. First of all, I had an 11 dollar late fee, so blockbuster obviously couldnt find it in their hearts to apply the "no late fee" motto retroactively. Second, it isnt really "no late fee's" anyway. The clerk told me that if you need to keep the movies an extra "couple" of days then thats ok and you wont be charged any late fee, but after that you will be charged the full price of the movie, in effect buying it. Now, everyone with half a brain realizes that this is not even remotely close to the promised "no late fees". all that blockbuster has done has extended the viewing period a couple of days, and forced you to purchase the movie if you dont return it on time for the full purchase price, not minus rental fee. This is retarded. How is this better? if i really wanted to buy the movie i would have done that in the first place, what would i be doing at the video RENTAL store? Also, what the hell does a couple of days mean anyway? do they mean that in the technical "2 day" sense, or do they mean that in the generic "give it back in a couple days" sense, which could mean the same thing as bring it back later or bring it back in a few days.

the only reason blockbuster has done this gimmicy ad campaign is because so many people are renting their movies online and through the mail these days, and they wanted something to get you back in the stores. Of course, once they get you back, they bend you over and give it to ya good.

the catch heard round the world

the pass heard round the world


well, its offical. the 2005 Capital One bowl game had the greatest bowl game finish of all time-and i was there to witness it. After Iowa dominated the Tigers for 3 full quarters, the Tigers pulled off a very stunning and courageous comeback in the 4th to actually pull ahead by 1 with about a minute left. After a few passes for modest gain, the Hawks got a false start call against them when Drew Tate attempted to spike the ball the stop the clock. However, because of the false start, the spike was negated and the clock kept running. with about 6 seconds left it was obvious that Tate was foolishly not going to take a timeout. Everyone started cussing out Tate, and we had all but given up when he stepped up to the line of scrimmage and hiked the ball with four seconds left. What happened after that is almost indescribable. Tate dropped back in the pocket and heaved the ball to the right center of the field towards what appeared to be an open hollaway. I thought that he was just throwing a last second desperation pass until I realized that Hollaway was actually open. Then suddenly the ball that looked like it was overthrown landed softly into hollaways hands and he strolled in to the endzone for a 56 yard touchdown reception and the win. Mayham ensued. The crowd went nuts, beer was flying everywhere, my friends and I have bruises on the back of our legs from falling and being pushed into the bleachers, grown men around me were visably crying, it was absolutely amazing. I forgot to breathe for almost a minute and had to sit down to catch my breath and try to let it all sink in. It just didnt seem real. still doesnt. after the catch the LSU fans on the other end of the field stood their stunned for what seemed to be an eternity. I almost felt sorry for them because they had played such a good game, but i didnt let that cloud my excitement over the win. After the game, while we were walking back to the buses, the usual anger or joy that resides on fans faces was replaced by sheer disbelief. fans from both teams walked like zombies with either a frown or a smile on their faces back to the buses and tailgates. It was one of the most amazing things I have ever seen in my life. People will talk about this game for many many years to come.
other than that it was a pretty normal trip down to florida from iowa. A few observations I did make while on the trip:

1. if you are over 6 foot tall and are planning long trips, dont ever buy or rent a GMC Envoy. It has the worst leg room of all time.

2. If you are ever going to Orlando and plan on cabbing it downtown or anywhere else, dont stay in Winter Park because cabs will not venture out there....ever.

other than that, a great trip.

Funny Story--we were traveling through Macon, Georgia when we stopped at a gas station. As we were paying at the counter the sherriff pulled up right outside the shop. One of the gas station attendants asked the other attendant "hey, is that Billy or Bob?", to which the other attendant answered "No, thats Billy Bob." ---Now that is comedy, talk about stereotypes.