cat's knees

I just found out today that cats have knees. For some reason I find that disturbing.

I love graham crackers

So, little known fact, at least to me. Apparently, Mr. Graham, the creator/inventor of the graham cracker, did so because he wanted people to stop masterbating. It's true. Back in the 30's/40's/50's or whatever socially and scientificially unenlightened time this man created these crackers, it was widely believed that whole grains diminished one's desire to masterbate. Because he thought masterbating was a sin and evil, Mr. Graham created the graham cracker so that people would have more whole grains in their diet and would be less inclined to spank the monkey. I've had graham crackers. They are delicious, but that's about it.

meeting the parents

I often hear stories from a variety of people that are both astounding and unbelievable. Most of the time I don't believe them, but that does not diminish their greatness. My boss recently told me a supposedly "true" story about a friend of his that had a horrible experience meeting the parents of his girlfriend. So he goes to his girlfriends house to pick her up one night and both of her parents are home. She is still upstairs getting ready. They graciously invite him in and make their way over to the couch to sit and chat. Not wanting to be rude, he oblidges them. They engage in pleasant chit-chat, talk about the weather and how he met their daughter. He was trying his best to make a good first impression because, everyone knows, you only get one chance to do that. At one point he reaches into his front pocket to take out his cell phone and check the time. To his horror, he realizes that in the process of removing said phone a condom had fallen out and onto the couch, in plain view of her parents. In a panic he points to the back door and says "hey, whats that out there?" Of course, both parent turn around to inquire. As they have their head turned he quickly scoops up the condom and shoves it back into his pocket. He is convinced they have not noticed it, he is in the clear. However, his assurance turns to fear as he looks up and sees both parents staring dissaprovingly at him. He knows they couldn't have seen the condom, there's no way...what was the problem. He cocks his head to the right and glances out the back door in another effort to deflect attention from himself. To his horror, in the middle of the back yard there are two dogs humping.