4 horseman

So the apocalypse is upon us. My whole perception of reality came violently crashing down today when I found out my best friend Josh is going to be a father. I got a call after class today from my friend Jason, who told me that his mother told him, and she found it out from a source that is to remain anonymous. Holy shit. This is disturbing on 2 levels.

1. My soon-to-be-father friend is the type of guy that just started swearing after high school; who just started drinking in college. There is nothing wrong with this, but lets just say he was a bit late to catch the maturity bus. For example, this is the guy that asked on a camping trip in 8th grade when "guys get their periods"; this is the guy that thought he lost his virginity in college because he got a blowjob. It was not easy explaining to a 22 year old man how one medically and scientifically loses their virginity.

2. This is the first girl he has ever had sex with, according to medical science (see above). I have never actually met her, but from his stories she is not what doctors call "stable". She has broken up with him repeatedly, came running back to him, and told him she loved him after about a week or so. Odd. I suspect that this is the type of girl that utters the famous last words:

"of course I took my birth control pill"

or

"NO, I would never poke holes in your condoms!"

In any event, I really did see pigs fly today and I don't have anything to shoot them down...Of course I do suspect someone will be getting out the "shotgun" soon, if you know what I mean.